LamikayTy

I remember clearly (I use the word remember a lot) coming home from hospital still in pain after a painless delivery but almost botched and fatal after-delivery session and being welcomed back by a visitor with “Ahhh the next one will be 2 boys”.

I was stunned, my 9-months of ‘pre-labor’ and surgery that almost took my life after a natural birth was not reckoned to be anything by this ignoramus! all because I had a beautiful daughter to show for it and not a son? Of course not but such ignorance (even among highly or supposedly educated people) is displayed in large numbers in our society.

Lase, my darling turned 2 and the questions which had hitherto been largely muted (only obvious sometimes because of questioning looks at ones mid-section) suddenly grew loud mouths – Ojo wo ni o ma gba aburo? She needs playmates o! I reply with “She has many!” When has one child suddenly become not enough? – this is a post for another day!

I do not know what a boy is supposed to portray – a family name that will thankfully now go on forever or …???? I don’t know o! My sister and I (my twin) were only-children for almost 10years before my brother came along. It was only then we realised (or let me speak for myself) I realised that ‘something’ had been missing. My parents never said or did anything to indicate we weren’t welcome – far from it! It was the comments from visitors…”Aah my mums feet had now been planted solidly in the home” Duh! After 10 years??? An elderly relative came rushing into the house almost knocking us down in her bid to see the ‘Son’ and we were ……? lol!

Thankfully I grew up knowing that we were not inconsequential in the scheme of things! Girls and boys are human beings, gifts from God and to be treated as such. My daughter will grow up knowing she’s special and I won’t trade her for 10 boys. She’ll grow up in the knowledge (Because I will teach her) of her place in society, family and culture albeit with the useless notion that ‘boys’ complete homes erased from the lessons I’ll pass on to her.

Like a song we sang a lot back then ….

“Lord I keep on thanking you,

for making me a woman (Lord)

and not a man (said with jeering faces at the boys in sunday school)

Lord, make me a virtuous one

One whose price is far above rubies.”

…I’m precious, I’m special and I’m loved by my father (on earth and in Heaven) and that counts a great deal!

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